Ryan Casey
DOD // 01.29.2022
HOMETOWN // Morristown, NJ
DOB // 07.01.1993
LEADERSHIP - BRAVERY - ZEST - HUMOR
Ryan Casey was born July 1, 1993 in New York City. His formative years were spent in New Jersey, where he grew up and went to school. The first thing to know about Ryan is he always wanted to be surrounded by friends. And, given how easily he made friends, there were usually a whole lot of people around.
In addition to being with friends, Ryan loved all things military: toy army men and toy guns were his favorites. He also loved just hanging out and finding ways to have fun and have a laugh. If there is such a thing as a "boy's boy," Ryan was it. His spontaneity and maturing personality became infectious. Wherever he was, you could count on having fun, and his crowd of friends just continued to grow.
So did his impact on his family. Ryan had an older sister, a younger sister, and a younger brother, Jack. Ryan was the classic big brother and always provided great stories and jokes to entertain the whole family. Jack always looked up to Ryan. When I broke the news to Jack that Ryan had died, through his tears Jack said, "Ryan was the best of us." I don't think I will ever forget those five words—it’s the consummate description of Ryan Casey.
Ryan had a relationship with his mom that can only be described as extraordinary. Their connection was so special, I really don't even know how to describe it, so I'm not going to try.
Ryan's dad spent a lot of time with Ryan developing his interest in baseball and the New York Yankees. Ryan had a knack for baseball and played for many, many years, including on his Uncle J.P.'s softball team. He was also the assistant coach for J.P.'s grade school baseball team.
Ryan went to Villanova University and graduated with a degree in Political Science. Shortly after that, he went to Officer Candidate School to become a Marine Officer. It was during Marine training that Ryan became best friends with Mike Laffin. Throughout the many hardships of Marine training, Ryan would always talk about "Laffin" (never using Mike's first name) as someone who he counted on to survive.
Parents should never have to suffer the loss of a child. This isn't the natural order of things. We miss Ryan every minute of every day and that will never change. It is hard to think of any "silver linings" but there is one: We are blessed that Ryan's friends keep in touch with our family. We are so grateful to have people around us like Mike Laffin who have shared so many memories of Ryan. The bond with Ryan was so strong that Mike and many of Ryan's friends are now a part of our family. People like Mike Laffin are the reason why Ryan will live forever in our hearts.
Character Strength Stories:
Leadership, Bravery, & Loyalty - When Ryan was 13 or 14, he gathered six of his friends for some mischievous activities on “cabbage night,” the night before Halloween. Ryan thought it would be fun to throw eggs at passing automobiles on a busy street near our home. (Questionable judgement!) One of the cars the boys egged was a police car. The car came to a screeching stop, turned on its siren and did a U-turn to find the perpetrators. The boys ran as fast as they could to a densely wooded side street. After the initial sprint, Ryan regrouped the boys only to find that his best friend Johnny was no longer with them. The boys were terrified because they could see the police officer on the side street, using his side light to slowly look tree by tree for the boys. Ryan told the other boys he was going to get Johnny. None of the other boys were up to the task so Ryan crawled through the woods alone until he found his friend shaking with fear behind a tree. Ryan convinced Johnny to crawl back with him, under the searching lights of the police. When the boys got back to our house, they hid under Ryan’s bed for hours, thinking the police would knock on our door at any moment, but Ryan was incredibly proud of how he helped his friend.
Zest & Humor - During TBS (the 2nd phase of Marine Officer training), Ryan and one of his best friends, Lieutenant Laffin, had both been assigned to stay in a concrete shelter. It was the middle of winter and the shelter was without heat or electricity. The two Lieutenants described the conditions as miserable. Cold, wet, and dark. They would spend hours and hours training in the frigid weather, only to come to the shelter at night and sleep on a concrete floor. The harsh conditions were wearing on the two Marines. One night, Lt. Laffin came into the shelter after a long day in the field. It was dark, so he was using his flashlight to find a spot to settle in for the night. Suddenly, the flashlight was illuminating Ryan, with a few empty Spaghetti-O cans around him. He’d been sitting alone in the dark, feasting on cold Spaghetti-O’s out of a can. He was smiling from ear to ear. Ryan said, “I’m so happy, I’ve been looking forward to this all day!” Laffin just laughed and said he couldn’t help but catch some of Ryan’s infectious enthusiasm!
-Submitted by Jim & Alison Casey, Surviving Parents